YOU have to MAKE & TAKE time for YOU
In my experience, it's a trend that lacks in a particular type of person who often puts others before themselves. This is a great quality to be one of those types of people! However, it is also your worst enemy. It's easy to get caught into taking on more than we can handle, focusing our attention on others needs/wants more than our own, and spending most of our own energy on dealing with those other people (which inevitably leaves very little energy left to put into our own health and well being).
My line of work is very easy to grab you and trap you into that way of thinking. I care for all my clients equally and have had most of them for a very long time. This makes it incredibly simple for me to put them first before my own mind and body health. In turn, that leads to my own poor health, stress and burnout (which has definitely happened a few times in the past).
Over the past few weeks, I've seen this in a couple other people; putting everyone else before themselves. In some cases worrying about things that they have no control over. And in some ways, worrying about things that are a side-effect of the underlying issue. I had a great conversation with a client last week about this. 2 weeks ago she mentioned some of these concerns to me, and so I sent her a sleep questionnaire to get to the bottom of things, and to see if we can start to attack the issues progressively;
She can't sleep.
She wakes up feeling low energy.
She's feels she needs to please everyone, and therefore sometimes takes on more than she needs to.
She is constantly stressed out.
She is concerned about her weight gain.
She eats habitually before bed at times.
and so on...
I get it. I think many of us are either there, or have been at some point in our lives. I tried to help her understand that it's ok to slow down, step back for a bit, and solely focus on one step at a time (not to mention focus on herself). I reminded her how some things are side-effects of another; The poor sleep is most likely the underlying cause of things like weight gain, low energy and stress for example. This can't be rushed and it definitely will not fix itself quickly. We need to chip away at it, slowly and ideally in a way that causes as little stress as possible.
We reviewed 3-main areas of concern that I found from her questionnaire answers, that would potentially be a root cause of the side-effects. From there, I gave her the option; "Which one do you want to attack first?" In doing so, we don't worry about the other stuff. They will come in time. We have one sole focus on a daily basis, and it's to attack the issue that you choose to change.
I wanted to remind her that, without her own health, without her own energy, she won't be able to take care of those she cares about. With trying to please everyone all the time, she will only burn herself out and in turn put a much greater risk on her own health. No one can please everyone.
I've done it, many people I know have done it (or are doing it). I learn more and more through these experiences the importance of taking time to slow down, evaluate your priorities and evaluate your own daily practices that will lead to better overall health and daily energy.
There will always be an excuse not to do something for yourself;
Get rid of that mindset.
Make YOU a priority and fit in time(s) throughout each day to focus on YOU.